Beginnings anew

Several things over the last few years have made me take time to sit and reflect on things. What can I say? I had a bad year or so a couple of years back and It really made me think of people or humanity in a very different and negative light. Pretty much all of my past relationships have been Ill-fated sadly usually involving them cheating on me. As I person I'm very much a romantic, usually preferring a darker feel or ambience... Thus it isn't surprising that each time this has happened my self esteem -which isn't particularly high to begin with - plummets. This happened a lot with one of my longer relationships and in honesty it left me feelin very morose and in a sense worthless as I always blame myself for those kind of actions. This relationship in question is long over, yet still I find people telling me stories of other untoward ad sorded actions he performed whilst we were together. In a word.. "ouch" it still stings. The reason for writing this blog is not to slander but rather to vent and perhaps provide light at the end of the tunnel for those who are unfortunate enough to have experienced similar. I'm a bit of a fighter, I try not to let my emotions show... I can't even physically cry. However the whole experience has left me as a real misanthropist. This I have always been in a sense and in any case I do not agree with and thoroughly dislike 'one night stands', 'fuck buddies' and the like. I tend to avoid people who do such as I see intercourse as something that should only be done in a relationship (a loving one at that) but that's my opinion and everyone is entitled to their own. Now Then, my tale gets a bit lighter and hopefully it will not end in such a forlorn was as the others have. My current partner is not like the others. I'm genuinely happy, more so than I have been for a long time. For once I can be loving and romantic without it being shunned. I wrote this post because I found a elated ending at the end of a dark time, a lot of my friends have had harsh tidings recently and hopefully this will pick them up because if I can be happy so can you! Keep your chin up, stay strong and everything will get better.