WGW

Wow, okay its been a few years since I have been and now I am Taking my other half for out anniversary ^^... the official Date is October 31st but he has never been to WGW so I thought it would be nice to spend the time there for a week. I have tickets booked to see the bands and oh yes we intend to hit the club nights there as well as the pubs, a few older attractions etc. I think we are looking forward to a few days of wondering around the nice scenery to be honest with you.

Packing finishes today and I have an exam tomorrow before we go... eeekk a long day of travelling and on Samhain to :( but I'm sure the rest of the week will make up for it. I can't wait to see all my old friends, some of which I have not seen for a good few years. The good part is its all the music I grew up with and aren't played all that often anymore so double win here.

I will post up some pictures when we get home but I'm looking forward to a nice time away with my sexy man.

Hitting a down-slope

Those times you just want to scream and cry... but I can't cry.
Everything has hit me at once and I'm just feeling more and more low. I've been so very stressed recently, with University screwing timetables and re-enrolment around. Moving house, ill horses. It's all building up on me and its really starting to show.

I am not and have never been a pretty girl, but I wasn't the worse thing out there and I was happy enough in my skin. Recently I took on some work which I really regret doing, it only served to stress me out more and more... and it made me realise that I look awful right now. My skin is worse than it has been for a very long time, my hair is dull. I take care of myself, I have a strict cleansing/care routine but its no longer having the effect it used to.

I look old, its really upsetting me.

Stress-rashes keep breaking out, ultimately I feel very very low. Even my burlesque work isn't picking me up and I'm worried it will start to effect that to. Depression is a horrible thing and generally I do not get depressed easily.

I'm sick of it, no longer feeling like myself is horrible and I want to pick myself up. To top it all off Student Finance hasn't paid into my bank yet. Just more stress to add to the pile.

I know Cai is being very supportive, I love him to pieces but I can't help but worry that he will run off with a better looking bint... everyone else did.

I don't know what to do, I don't know what will help. Suggestions anyone?

New house!

Excited, bewildered.... I can't really think of any other words to describe how I fell right now and that's putting it lightly. I don't think those words quite catch the emotion correctly but words are escaping me right now.

This year has been the best year of my life so far, both physically and emotionally. I am genuinely happy. Hopefully I have many good years ahead of us.

Cai recently brought a house and asked me to move in with him, lucky me  ^0^

As I write we are in the middle of decorating and it looks lovely so far, can't wait until everything is sorted. There is a massive workshop at the back of the house which will get a lot of use. Both myself and the better half are rather crafty people. Lots of pretties on the way.

On that note The better half is actually going to join me in a bit of corsetry and make me a special corset ^^ can't wait to see how it comes out.

Let the crafting commence!!!

Certain substances

A few things have happened recently, mostly in regards to friends but I thought I would share my own thoughts on various rather sore subjects.

First off... alcohol. I very rarely drink anymore. I am a bit of a fitness nut and alcohol has a negative effect on the body and brain. But you already knew that. My little nephew has just turned 18 and is constantly getting wrecked. He has a good time, its his choice. yet he moans when it makes him ill or he has a bad hangover... don't drink then problem solved. I used to drink a copious amount of alcohol, and mixing etc. Pretty much every day when I was younger. My first partner was older than me and used to take me to pubs underage. Yet I never got drunk and trust me we drank a lot.

my Father has a history of being a violent drunk so I'm not fond of being around drunk people anyway. It wasn't worth risking my health anymore so I stopped drinking so much, I keep it to occasions now. I just don't see the point in it anymore.

Next on my list is drugs. I despise them. Have never ever touched any (nope not even weed) and I never will. They are dangerous and useless. Failing to make you cool and more like an obsessive lunatic or complete twat half of the time. I will bear no company with anyone who partakes in any drug whatsoever. Before some smart arse says that medicines are drugs and so is caffeine... yep I know that, I am studying medicine. I am talking about illegal substances, hallucinogens.. ie LCD, ketamine, amphetamines, coke etc. Sadly they have been strongly connected with the goth and cybergoth scene which I do not agree with at all. There is just no need for it.

In the past I have left three partners for taking these substances, just can't stand them. But once again it's their choice I am merely expressing my distaste for such.

If you have to take drugs or drink a copious amount of alcohol to have a good time then clearly there is something laking in your life (in my opinion). I can't see the need or reason to take them (save for medicinal reasons). Its not 'big' or clever.

I am happy to hear other people's thoughts on this matter, as a medical student it is something that could be worth hearing.

Over to you!

A word on fitness

With the end of the Olympics and the start of the paralympics dawning I believe this is an appropriate time to talk about fitness.
I always have been rather sporty and I'm a bit of a fitness nut. At school I used to do PE three times a week out of choice, I got an a* at GCSE, on top of this I used to play for the school hockey team twice a week, then I used to go athletics training three times a week, not including competition days. I then used to go Badminton on a Friday morning and Use the Gym on a Thursday and Friday lunch time followed by cross country training. I have a lot of certificates and medals for various sports. Then after school I used to go and look after the horses which meant another 4/5 hours riding depending on how many of the 5 horses I owned at the time I would ride this would be everyday without fail including shows and competitions on Sundays. This was followed on a Tuesday evening and Saturday morning by Aikido and Archery training.

So Yea I was a bit of a sport nut, still am though it is mostly jogging, horse-riding and various forms of dance. I am a bit obsessed with keeping healthy and fit. I naturally have a washboard flat stomach yet a curvy hourglass shape so I try to keep this. Burlesque keeps me fit as I'm practising most days. On top of this the dance I do is Bellydance, salsa and ballroom. This isn't all, I am also a Zumba fanatic. Its so much fun and my instructor is really good.

Too many people I know say they want to lose weight and yet all they do is diet, you need to exercise if you want to lose weight as well as maintain a balanced, nutritional diet.

Actually I struggle half the time because my metabolism is very quick and I can accidentally lose weight if I'm not careful which is not what I want to do. Therefore I eat a lot to make up for it.

Balance is the key.

General geekery... Games and other hobbies

Right now I have some time to relax before the hectic moving and reflect on some of my other hobbies. Things have died down on the dread making front, I have another stall in September but for the moment I'm concentrating on my burlesque and modelling work. Anyway enough with prefaces and the like, I have a fair few hobbies that I don't really talk about much save to those who know me. In other words my partner, family and close friends. Having a love for fantasy, both light and especially dark - including mythology of course - means that I will naturally have a love for things surrounding these genres. My religion I'm neo-pagan which is obvious and I have been for many many years, pretty much was raised it. Anyway back on track... I used to be and still am an avid gamer, I adore fantasy based RPGs, platform, retro, sci-fi, action and horror games. Though this said I can often be found playing with my little sister on the wii... It's fun I will admit. Though my favourite games of all reflect my favourite series of books (aside from the works of JRR Tolkien yep that's right, I adore LOTR grew up on it so sue me) which is Neverwinter nights, ice wind dale trilogy, baulder's gate and the like. I love them so much fun to play though they are old now. Looking forward to the new RA Salvatore collaboration. My older brother used to love D&D as well as tabletop war games as he is 14 years older than me this meant that I used to watch him play and join in as best I could from a young age. These are two things that I still do today. Being an avid games workshop fanatic as well as D&D gamer. It says something when my mum noted and complained that whilst I was with my ex I didn't game anymore. That was one huge mistake I won't make again. He wasn't worth it. I have several armies, ranging from vampire counts, Lotr, wood elves, dark elves, chaos, tomb kings etc. wood elves are my favourite, I have a very strong affinity to elven lore. I was actually called an elf by friends when I was younger for many many years. I'm not complaining.

As to other games in particular I'm a sucker for card games, magic the gathering being an old favourite. Cai and I went to the latest prelaunch and had a great time as most of the hobbies i have so to does he. Win on this front. I used to also Larp which is something I don't do anymore but I do still build and craft costumes for, especially my friends and other people. These are just the gaming style hobbies, I do have loads more an relative posts will be put up in due course.

Nihon!

Busy looking  through old photos and boxes when I found some lovely memorabilia from my trip to japan in 2005 .... it seams like such a long time ago now.

I adored it, I am lucky enough to of been able to study Japanese at GCSE and so know a lot about the culture and language and its just amazing. I really do think highly of the japanese, in particular the scientists in nanotechnology and other areas.

The culture is very different from here and one must say that I do prefer it there. Whilst there I got to see some amazing things, both new and old, traditional parts of Japan including an Okiya where we saw traditional and very real Geisha's performing... they are so beautiful.

I do so miss all my friends over there, And thankfully I can say that I will be returning there very very soon ^^

Nihon ni ikimashou!

Here are some photos from when we were there... sadly I have lost weight since then (illness and stress mostly but I am putting weight back on, also I was 16 haha)

me in the nightmare t-shirt with my best friend at the time Chris

This is Minami and Yuko ^^

This is the Back of my Kimono, Yep I brought myself a real Traditional Japanese Kimono from a geisha market, with the obi of course. I also brought geta, a parasol and dancing fans

We went to bepu bay, and thus the hot springs named 'Bloody hell'

They have black swans ^^ taihen Kirei desu ne!

We saw so much more than I have named and met loads of people. I miss my EGL friends the most :( see you very soon lovelies!